I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Randomize
