I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
