So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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