The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
