I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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