We're like a lot better than the average bears
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
