Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
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I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
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it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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