Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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