I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
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