He asked me if I "almost moaned"
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize