All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
