Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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