i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
