this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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