We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
He did a backflip because drugs
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
