i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I am midnight drunk by noon
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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