just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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