i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
