is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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