Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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