I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Randomize
