thus making me awesome and them whores
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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