talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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