just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
