I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I wear drunk well.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
