my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
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