I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize