How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I can't trust your balls anymore.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize