the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Semen is not good for contacts.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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