I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
