whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Randomize
