U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Just took my morning after pill in the library
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Randomize
