i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
