You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Rumble strips road head = magical
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
