in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
