He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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