did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
