Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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