HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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