I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
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