you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
