im about as happy as oj after his trial
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
