I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
