Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
no you cant smoke seaweed
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize