Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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