I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
