That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
then he tried to convert me to islam
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
