he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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