I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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