you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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