6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
